Motherhood … Nothing Prepares you for It

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I am a bookworm, so naturally the first thing I thought of after discovering I was pregnant was a trip to the bookshop. I started looking for all sort of books about pregnancy and taking care of newborns, which I will be reviewing and recommending some of them later in future posts.

 Next step was online, I spent few hours every day during my 9 month pregnancy surfing the internet for websites and articles providing info about pregnancy, what to eat, what to take to the hospital, what to buy for your newborn …etc. I even joined a couple of forums and started asking questions of expert mums in there.

I read the books, surfed the internet and recalled every single conversation I had with my friends, whom were blessed with children before me, about how to take care of babies and that was it, I felt I was completely ready and prepared to be the perfect mum I hoped to be.

Needless to say I was delusional. Don’t get me wrong, the books and all the info I got did help me but not at first.

The first couple of days after coming home from the hospital with Omar (AKA: Maro) I was a total wreck, I felt so helpless and clueless that the first time I put the diaper on my son I put it backwards. I was afraid I would carry him in the wrong way and hurt him and I felt that all the stuff I read was great but not for now, not for those first few weeks and I just felt so lost.

I actually had a couple of breakdowns the first few weeks. I remember the second night home my son kept crying all night and wouldn’t stop except when I am carrying him and even then he would stop for few minutes and then resume crying. I didn’t know what was wrong and no matter what I did he wouldn’t stop crying. As I was laying in bed and Omar between my hands I couldn’t help but look around this perfect room I have prepared for him and think what a lousy mum I am. I was only good in picking baby furniture, decorating the room but I can’t get my son to calm down and can’t figure out what is wrong with him.

Next day when I called the doctor I learnt from him that the baby was suffering from colic and that this was normal for newborns and he prescribed something to give him to ease the pain for whenever he gets it again.

That day I realized that it doesn’t matter how much I read or how much I know, nothing will ever fully prepare me for motherhood, because it is not something you learn from books but rather something you learn and master with practice day by day.

So what’s my point ... to all the new mums and mums to be out there, read the books, surf the net, talk to other mums and learn from their experience but always bear in mind that you will face new things in your life as a mother that you don’t  know anything about, kinda like curve balls, and when that happens don’t panic, keep it together and try to figure it out for yourself, and if you failed don’t worry because that is what motherhood is all about; you and your baby venturing together in life and learning from each other hoping to make it safely in this big world.